Namaste, (I salute the divinity in you)
“When we are able to take refuge in ourselves, we can merge without fear because we feel whole no matter where we are”
There are some people who are very self-differentiated. I am reading this from Charoltte Kasl.
1. Maintaining one’s center. This includes valuing integrity, being able to define one’s self, being able to articulate one’s needs, stand firm to say yes or no.
2. Knowing one’s value is a given
3. Developing a set of values through reflection, awareness, learning and experimentation, instead of relying on external authority. This involves trusting our internal wisdom and experience.
4. Feeling comfortable or fascinated by different theories, belief systems and perspectives. Differences are natural, unthreatening and interesting.
5. Being able to self-reflect and self-confront
6. Asking for and receiving support without feeling weak and compromised
7. Giving without agenda, or the feeling we are giving away a part of ourselves. (Ah, this is a beautiful feeling. Better than hindi poetry)
8. Seeing others clearly. As we differentiate, we stop categorizing people, we drop our expectations and preconceptions.
9. Learning to comfort and soothe ourselves when faced with stress or difficulties
I feel sensitive to characteristics in emotions. We have emotional needs; the need to feel acknowledged, the need to feel secure, to feel loved, to have a purpose. What is knowing? Ah, it is so important to give power to the other in conversations by listening with all sincerity and interest. Each moment in conversation with a stranger, is another story in your life. How else does a person become a part of you? Sometimes when I become excited in the act of knowing I ask ‘Who are you? Tell me about YOU.’ When someone becomes important to me, I ask ‘What makes him/her feel loved and acknowledged?’ Characters are fascinating things to explore. What tapestry you can create, in a relationship what tapestry you can create!
I have a great relationship with Amir, with Nadia, with my Ismail Chacha. And Amir and I….ah, Amir is my soulmate. I am so blessed to have him in my life. Ours is..ah, there’s no point in explaining. We were just…nevermind.
I also had a beautiful relationship with my former partner. We knew of an end. But he said always kept saying ‘It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’. This was the wealth he left me.
I have this set of audio recordings, readings I made from extracts of books that moved me at the time of reading. They are neatly dated but I don’t use or listen to them. I send them out to others.
I have a last hour to write and to play my bansuri (Amir tells me I might as well blow a pen, sometimes the sound is so stubborn!) before another week of grueling work. Two nights ago after finishing work, I said ‘Ok what should I do now?’ Then I snapped. I don’t have to work all the time. Today is strange – I had no FI emails.
Toh phir aao, mujhko sataoo
Aabhi jao, Aabhi jao
Beautiful, just beautiful